This isn’t to just 2012, this is to my life. I hope to always follow my heart, to my gut feeling, and not to doubt myself. To give myself credit and to push myself harder. Not to be taken advantage of. To establish myself.
Also never doubt myself, because if I doubt myself everyone else will too.
My New Years always seem to be so bland and uneventful… Well hopefully this one will be different.
Marcus
Hasselblad 503cx - film scan
There is nothing more special than being able to have someone in your life that you can get to know better by photographing them. Also having a boyfriend who is so photogenic and willing to be my model on call is so amazing. Finally making images of a male that I actually like… that I actually feel something for.
For my third term review a comment left in my portfolio was “We would love to see more males!” This is my response. I have never really taken a photo of a male that I truly loved, but I truly love this one.
The best part of life is having extreme lows so you know the feeling of being extremely happy. That is my number one goal in life is to make myself happy and eliminate the things that don’t make me happy. The feeling of letting go of the things that no long work with the flow of life is necessary. The big part is being ok with it and accepting that it is an interruption.
This is to making it a year at Art Center and succeeding. This is to making necessary changes. This is breathing a little deeper and seeing more clearly. This is to mistakes. This is to my one year anniversary making it on my own in a new city and the world at my feet.
I wrote this March 18, 2006 when I was 17
I WANT TO BE A FASHION PHOTOGRAPHER…
thats what i’m working towards…
and i’m nervous/anxious/excited..
its RISKY business…and i’ll be expecting to live the “starving artist” life for awhile…
and i’m ok with that…
i’ve found what i love…what takes my breath away…and what i can do for hours and never
notice the minutes ticking by.
its worth it
Today January 30, 2011- 22 years old. Still working the dream… still chasin it. Never give up.
All the other journal entries during that time are just obnoxious. I don’t know what my problem was.
I’m starting to pack up now. i can’t even concentrate so many thoughts are going through my head. I want to go but I don’t at the same time. This is all I really know and like many others I cling to what is familiar.
I wish I could see what could have happened but at the same time it’s not part of the plans and I am a firm believer that whatever is suppose to happen will happen. Maybe it was a helpful reminder of what I should like.
i’m going crazy in my room with all my shit sprawled out everywhere. I am having a mini breakdown.
